´Cause I cannot stay within
This motionless netherworld
Within my chrysalis cold
Will I emerge like butterfly into the vibrant daylight?
Those are words from my song “At the Dreams Door” that was featured in my second album The Underliving.
As you may have already noticed I love fairy tales and fantasy. Not only my music and art nourish from it, I have a collection of illustrated fairy tales. I simply love all those XIX and early XX illustrations with fairies and princesses in my magic attire… :). Reading fantastic stories with a hot mug of tea, one of my favourite thing to do on moody rainy days.
So I was away hiking recently with some friends that were visiting when @hedac made a phone call and told me he had found a little butterfly in the music studio. It had been born from a chrysalis that came along with a purchased plant. The little creature had perched confidently on Héctor and and refused to leave on that chilly and rainy day. So the butterfly got all cozy and was our “fairy” companion for the day, cleaning its antennae with its fore legs, perching on our hands… we were mesmerized and for a few hours we forgot all about our daily tasks to take pictures and film it. So small, and yet so magical… I’m always amazed by the patterns in the wings. As an illustrator I find it so inspiring so I made a few doodles on my sketchbook. I confess I like moths over vivid colored butterflies and I feel more inclined to the muted colors of moths. Maybe because I am myself kind of mousy. But this little butterfly also had these brown earth moth colors… I wonder what kind of butterfly it is, if any knows let me know to edit it and include the species. 🙂
I find metamorphosis such an outstanding and inspiring metaphor of TRANSFORMATION
So why sharing this personal moment here, because I wanted to speak about change…
we fear change…
Sometimes we feel the need but we refuse to change… we get
stuck in our old habits thinking that “changing” would be betraying some
rigid and frozen convictions we have built about ourselves, about who
we are. We smother ourselves keeping our thoughts inside a pre-made grid
because it is what it feels safe… This is the way we usually do
things so it’s “comfortable” to keep on doing the same. We even feel
guilty when the need of change becomes blatantly obvious.
I always say… “Thoughts are boundless” We should not have to feel fear of what comes next… if we “open our eyes” we can peek what lies ahead… It is not like moving forward blindly, but still there comes a moment where you have to take risks and nothing ever changes unless we give a first step… I know, it´s difficult for most of us, for me too, thus I write these motivational posts, they are also self-reminders. I can be bold and brave sometimes, but I also have moments where I’m beset by doubts and fear… fear to change!
And why do we fear to change? I guess we know that
sometimes this transformation is a time where we feel like stalling,
slow, trapped… The process is not immediate, it takes time, effort,
Hatching from a cocoon is a hard and very delicate time until we can unfold our wings and get ready to fly…
If not… ask this little fellow! 🙂
We can change for the better and that is not betraying ourselves…! We decide who we are, we decide who we will be.
And maybe there comes a time where we need to transform into something better, or more correctly something different to fulfill a purpose… and that doesn’t mean we are betraying ourselves or our work… we evolve, we grow, we transform and on our journey and sometimes we become something different than what we were when we started… still being OURSELVES. And the same with our goals and dreams… they shift too along with us.
We must acknowledge our mistakes and learn from them, but we must do it without self-punishing ourselves for having committed them but being proud of have been able to overcome them. Every struggle we have had to undergo has already changed us… They have made us stronger, and more aware.
What lies ahead is always UNCERTAIN, it has to be that way… but still we must fly away
Above: me with our visitor… I even filmed some scenes for a forthcoming music video, for a little while she was our “starlet” and model. I say “she” cos it´s a fairy princess in disguise… Then it vanished into thin air… we kept opening the door the following days so we hope it found its way out. Grateful for the magical moment you provided and the thoughts you evoked 🙂
Pd: In my head I’ll imagine my little friend like this… hope it made it somewhere safe. This other photo is another butterfly enjoying the lovely outdoors on a warm Spring day…
Who is longing and yearning for Spring? and butterflies?
But wait! almost time… all around me is changing and transforming too… all awaiting to grow!